'Crunch Time'

In the recent years, I found myself turning into a go-getter. I've always found a need to make plans, set goals and chase winds, to make sense of life and make every moment worth living for.

For the past couple of months, I've wondered if what I was doing was the 'right thing'. But the truth is, it was a decision that needed to be made and it was something that I felt, was worth a try.

My brother once told me, that as long as I felt uncomfortable, I am on the right path. Because it meant that I was fighting for something bigger. But the truth is, most of the time, I feel pretty incompetent; like what I'm doing is never enough and in fact, I'm not even sure if it's right.

Some may tell me that they admire my courage, for diving into something completely new. But when I sit down and ponder, I can't help but second-guess myself.

Now that it's 'crunch time', there is no time for mistakes and no time to waste. But I just really hope that at the end of all these, I will find an answer and very much hope, that I've painted a pretty damn good picture for myself.

You know you’ll be okay, but you still feel awful.

You know people love you, but it doesn’t feel like they do.

You know doing something will make you feel better, but you just don’t know how to.

You want to be well, but you just can’t seem to get there